When people says "You are stupid"

When you hear someone pointing finger towards you and says "you are stupid", "you are so so stupid", or "you are very stupid"...how do you feel? feel bad, feel disrespect, feel not appreciate? yes, most of us do feel that way...but I want to ask:

what does "stupid" really means?

since everyone have a different meaning to the same word, I check answers.com to find out its meaning.

Stupid means Slow to learn or understand.
Stupid means Tending to make poor decisions or careless mistakes.
Stupid means Marked by a lack of intelligence or care; foolish or careless.
Stupid also means Pointless; worthless


so of all the meaning there, it is quite subjective.
slow to learn? what is slow, what is fast? it is depends on the speaker frame of reference.
can we measure something base on a agreed standard? Key performance index (KPI) before we say to someone else "you are stupid"

When people judge, it is based his or her own experience and also, his state of mind at that moment, his emotion.

People who judge tends to forget that they are human. If you are human, you do make mistake, big or small, again, its quite subjective. what is a big mistake, what is a small mistake? what comparison you made? how accurate?

point 3, lack of care, why does a person lack of care? it is lack of sleep, is it overwork? is it too much pressure of work? how often he lack of care? too much? how you measure "lack of care"? and label a person as "stupid"

point 4, worthless? this is really unbelievable, the moment you speak out "you are stupid", the listener will leave you, and soon you will realize how valuable is the "listener" to you. is the listener worthless? probably not, you lost, you who judge people, lost a worthy person.... as the person leave you, you began to recall how much time you have invested, how much "the listener" has contribute to you, and you might start asking yourself quietly "why am i so stupid?"

To stop saying stupid, follow what Jesus says "Do not judge"

try to identify what exactly is the cause of the "stupid" moment
could it be lack of step-by-step process flowchart? or lack of performance measurement, or
lack of communication? or lack of understanding?

it is easy to say "stupid" when thing goes wrong, but it take wisdom to say "let's improve" in the midst of trouble.
An example would be:
"please tell me how I can help you improve your performance."
"How can we improve the situation?"

instead of "why do you make such stupid mistake?" "Please stop doing this stupid mistake", "you are so careless"...all these statement wouldn't help improve the situation. Stop saying it.

if you choose to improve, you will attract more people to follow you, you gain real respect at all time.

Thank you for reading.